Non-Baby Related News Update

[tehuti]

Today is Connor's seventh day of life. Two ideas are warring in my brain: "Is it really only seven days?" vs. "Holy crap, it's been seven days!"

The two have fought themselves to a stalemate at the moment. And despite all appearances to the contrary, there have been non-baby related activities and news happening here at Olympus. Ian had his first day back at work on Friday, Aimee actually took a work phone call the day after Connor's birth (yes, in the hospital), and I've been doing schoolwork.

Which brings me to the real meat of this update. I was officially not accepted to the PhD program at UMass this week. A couple weeks back, I got news I was wait listed, and not enough people said "no" for me to make it to the top of the list. Baring any surprises, at the end of summer, I'll have a master's degree in hand, and in little over a month, I will attend my final class as a college student.

And I am perfectly ok with it.

I've been feeling really conflicted about continuing, even before I decided to apply. On one hand, earning a doctorate has been my long term goal since very early on in my return to college. But on the other, I really feel done. Like, DONE done. I really want to start writing things because I want to, not because I have to for a grade. Right now, I'm working heavily on my research paper for my independent study this semester, which is good, but most of my writing this semester has been to prepare for comps. It is supremely unsatisfying. I've barely had time to blog (has anyone noticed that the birthday blogs are the first real substantial posts I've made in months?), and simply cannot make time for creative fiction.

Since I first went back to school in 2001, I've been at least a part time student every year since then, with only two semesters off completely. I've been a full time student for the last four years. In that time, I've earned two degrees, and will finish a third by the end of summer.

I've accomplished a lot. It's ok to feel done. It's ok to BE done.

Shortly before Connor's birth, I attended a speed-interview workshop for prospective museum professionals. I made a lot of contacts, at least two of which have great potential for future employment. My Master's program has prepared me well for life after school. I'm eager to get to it.

Last, and most importantly, I am not going to find work right away. The economy is still recovering, and jobs for people with my skill set and training are not common. While I'm searching for an income, I can play Mr. Mom so my other partners can bring home the tofu.

All of this is predicated on me not being a student next year. So I was leaning against continuing anyway, and now UMass made it moot for me.

And I'm really ok about it. Next fall, I might apply for programs again (not just UMass this time, and maybe not them again at all). There are things I'll miss about being a student. I'm going miss being part of an academic community. I'm definitely going to miss my library access. And I'll miss the types of conversations you only have while in grad school.

But I'm ready for what's next. My whole family is. Let's see what you got in store, Universe.

Comments

[sariel-t.livejournal.com]

I am excited for you, and I know exactly how you feel re: education. Keep me/us posted!

[lucky-otter.livejournal.com]

Regarding the library access, UMass makes it pretty easy for non-students (they call them "community members") to use the library. You'll lose the off-campus paper access since you won't have an OIT account, but you can still access them in the library, you can still use ILL, and you can still haunt the stacks all you like. Borrowing privileges are roughly the same, I think.

[tehuti.livejournal.com]

Being able to work from home is what I'll miss the most. Plus, without an OIT password, I won't be able to access some of the databases that I heavily rely on. There are some options elsewhere, but not having access to certain academic databases will make it harder for me to keep working on stuff.

[lucky-otter.livejournal.com]

Hm, I think you may be able to access those databases from systems actually *in* the library. Not sure though. Probably worth asking a librarian at some point when you're on campus, though. Maybe there's an option to keep access, perhaps at some fee.

[tehuti.livejournal.com]

I'm planning to do exactly that. :-)

[kouredios.livejournal.com]

I haven't had a chance to congratulate you on the baby, so congrats! That was a wonderful story to read.

I know how you feel about being done, too. After I finished my Masters, I was happy to walk away with an actually finished degree and earn real money for a while. Of course, I went back, but being done for two years felt really good. And I'm ready to be back and finish the PhD now.

Good luck in your future endeavors! And I agree with the above comment; I think you can access the databases from the computers on the main floor where you don't need an OIT account.

[cypherindigo.livejournal.com]

I may be able to help you with some of the researching issues, at least for journal articles and similar things.